1.1 Sibling Relationships”Sisters and brothers are the truest, purest formsof love, family and friendship, knowing when to hold you and when to challengeyou, but always being a part of you.” (Eastman,2017).
“They love each other. They’rebrother and sister. It’s one for all and all for one.” (Joe Ziemba)”Siblings are those with whom one most closely shares genetic, family,social class and historical background and to whom one is tied for a lifetimeby a network of interlocking family relationships” (White, 2001, p555). Siblingrelationship is incorporates activities as well as verbal and nonverbalinteractions between people who share the same biological parents (Cicirelli,1991).
Siblings assume a vital part in each other’s development throughoutlifespan (Yeh and Lempers 2004), also incorporated into young adolescent(Jensen et al. 2013).Siblings are aninstallation in the family lives of children and adolescents, and an assemblageof work documents their part in each other’s regular experiences as friends,associates, combatants, and as the center of social comparisons (McHale, Kim,and Whiteman, 2006). Thesibling’s relationship isn’t only influenced by them yet may likewise beinfluenced by other individuals, circumstances and conditions (Furman andLanthier, 1996). Indeed, even inside the same family, one sibling get alongbetter with sibling or siblings than another.1.1.1 Traditional Perspectives on Sibling RivalryBrothers and sisters are among therelatives with whom Islam commands us to uphold ties.
The Messenger ofAllaah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: “Allah says: ‘I amal-Rahmaan (the Most Merciful) and this rahm (tie of siblingship) has a namethat is derived from My name. Whoever uphold it, I will take care of him, andwhoever severs it, I will cut him off.'” (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1907; AbuDawood, 1694; classed as saheeh by Shaykh al-Albaani in al-Silsilahal-Saheehah, 520). The Prophet (peace and blessings ofAllah be upon him) said: “Whoever would like his lifespan to be extended andhis provision to be increased, let him uphold the ties of siblingship.”(Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1961; Muslim, 2557).
Their rights also include: that youshould not harm any of them in word or deed. The Prophet (peace and blessingsof Allah be upon him) said: “The Muslim is the one from whose tongue and handthe Muslims are safe.” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 10; Muslim, 40). And he (peaceand blessings of Allah be upon him) said, in a lengthy hadith in which heenjoined a number of virtues, “… If you cannot do that, then leave people alone(and do not offend them), for that is an act of charity that you do foryourself.” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 2382; Muslim, 84).Some of the sibling rivalryincidents among different religious books i.
e., Qur’an, the Torah and in theBible are presented like the account of Cain and Abel relate one sibling’sjealousy after God seems to support his sibling, and the envy at last promptskill. Jacob traps his brother Esau out of his legacy and blessing; Sisters Leahand Rachel rival for the love of Jacob; In the renowned story in the Qur’anabout Joseph, Joseph’s siblings endeavored to hurt him, prodded on by jealousyand rivalry.
The Qur’an says, “Assuredly, in (this account of) Josephand his brothers there are many sans (messages) for seekers of truth”(Yusuf 12:7). As is renowned, Prophet Jacob fathered twelve sons.Notwithstanding, Jacob observed incredible potential in Joseph and in this wayhe gave careful consideration to Joseph. Since this was self-evident, the othersiblings’ envy developed against Joseph.
One night Joseph had a dream. When hewoke he said to his dad, “0 my father! I saw in a dream eleven stars, aswell as the sun and the moon: I saw them prostrating themselves before me”(Yusuf 12:4).Jacob considered this dream, and he trusted it implied God wouldgive Joseph opportunity, gave on him an high level of respect and fame, andmake him a very important leader. Mindfulof the sentiments of alternate siblings toward Joseph, Jacob dreaded they wouldattempt to hurt him. So he let him know, “0 my son! Do not relate yourdream to your brothers, lest (out of envy) they devise a scheme against you.For Satan is a manifest enemy to human siblings (and can incite them to do sucha thing)” (Yusuf 12:5). The Qur’an goes ahead to depict the arrangementthe siblings brought forth, a ghastly case of exactly how far rivalry betweenkin can go: When they (the siblings tending to each other) stated, “Josephand his brother are indeed more loved by our father than we are, even though weare a powerful band (of greater use to him). Surely, our father is manifestlymistaken.
” (One of them said :)”Kill Joseph, or cast him out in some distant land so that your father’sattention should turn only to you, and after that you may again becomerighteous people.” (Yusuf 12:8-9)One can trace the instances of siblingrivalry in literature as well. Some of Shakespeare’s plays showed theoccurrences of sibling rivalry. King Lear incited rivalry among his threelittle girls by approaching them to portray their adoration for him; in asimilar play, Edmund thinks up to drive his stepbrother Edgar into cast out. InThe Taming of the Shrew, sisters Kate and Bianca were demonstrated fightingharshly. In Richard III, the title character was to some extent propelled byrivalry with his sibling, King Edward.
In As You like It, there was clearsibling competition and enmity amongst Orlando and Oliver, and furthermorebetween Duke Frederick and Duke Senior. Most adjustments of Sherlock Holmes portrayedsibling rivalry with his sibling, Mycroft Holmes (Wikipedia).In the light of various traditionalperspectives, sibling relationships are seen as multidimensional as variousaspects of sibling relationship is acknowledged and we have elaborate exampleof such aspects of their relationship as well.
Both positive and negative sides of these relationships and itsassociate interactions are also acknowledge like sibling rivalry, jealousy,warmth, affection and competition. 1.1.2 Factors Influencing Sibling RelationshipSiblingsfor the most part of their childhood spend with each other than they do withtheir parents.
The sibling relationship wasgenerally been disregarded by researchers until the 1980s (Dunn, 2002). It wasfrequently an unpredictable and complex relationship, like for some people itcan be a tremendous fountain of companionship and support (O’Bryant, 1988) yetit can likewise be a wellspring of rivalry, discord or uncertainty (Connidis,2007).Dunn(2002) refered to the three significant attributes of sibling relationships: 1)the strength and articulation of both positive and negative feeling amidchildhood and pre-adulthood, 2) the closeness of the relationship which wasfrequently a wellspring of either strife or support, and 3) these relationshipsdiffered as per the individual differences of the sibling with somedemonstrating positive sentiments and love, others indicated antagonistic vibeor animosity but others being undecided.
Sibling’s influence had gotten through avariety of ways including sibling modeling (Whiteman et al., 2014),differentiation between sibling (Schachter et al., 1976), and parentaldifferential treatment (Jensen et al., 2013). These processes were establishedon the concept that siblings compare themselves with each other, yet social comparisonbetween siblings had gotten insufficient consideration. Considering theapparently general nature of comparison, and additionally the behavioral andpsychological correlates of social comparison (Buunk and Gibbons, 2007), it wasessential to comprehend what part comparison plays inside family dynamics,particularly between siblings.1.1.
3 Sibling Interdependent RelationsAs indicated by researchers Mack(2004) and White (2001), relationships with family, especially kin, were seenas gatherings of “nested circles” initially proposed by Parsons(1943). The “inner circle” consisted of two conjugal families, those which wereusefully distinguished as the “family of orientation,” into which the child wasborn, and the “family of procreation,” which was started by marriage. The “outer circle” consisted offour pairs of family; the first pair was called the “first ascendant” whichincluded the families of one’s parents. Second pair was called “collateral families”the families of procreation of one’s own siblings and the third pair were knownas “the first descendant families” the families of procreation of one’s ownchildren. The last of “outer circle” family was the “in-law” family which isthe family of one’s spouse (Parsons, 1943).Siblings, on the whole,tend to fall in one’s “inner circles” in childhood, howeverfrequently move to the external circles as individuals’ age and consolidatelife partners and kids into the inner circles (White &S Riedmann, 1992).
Mack (2004) discussed about the infrequent situations of losing a parent inchildhood. In these cases, a kin may dependably stayed in an inner circle as asource of support, as the kin may have fortified because of such a traumaticincident.Lempersand Clark-Lempers in 1992 looked into the relative effective significance ofadolescents’ relations with their fathers, their mothers, their nearestsibling, their best same-sex companions, and their most essential teacher,separately. Adolescents’ closest sibling were positioned higher than theirparents, yet lower than their best same sex companions, for the traits ofamity, closeness, and nurturance.Inan examination by Seginer (1998), 147 eleventh-grade teenagers reported theirsiblings as a distinctive source of emotionally supporting partner, well beyondparental help and peer acknowledgment. An aggregate of 75% of young people inWoodward and Frank’s (1988) research asserted that sibling are the ones theyswing to for solace and talk while encountering lonesomeness.1.
1.4 Siblings and Identity/SelfSignificant continuity in the siblings’ relationships from childhood toadolescence had been found in the Cambridge Sibling Study in England (Dunn,1996). Positive and negative behaviors and sentiments of siblings about eachother in early years were significantly correlated with the nature of siblingrelationships later in adolescence. The nature of sibling relations may changeamid adolescence, in concurrence with the biological, cognitive, and social changesthat happened during that period of adolescence (Dunn et al., 1994).Theconflict in the sibling relationship might be assessed by the personality andindividuality traits of the sibling (Dunn, 2002).
Research demonstrated thatpeople who grow up with aggressive older sibling are themselves in peril ofnegative consequences, for example, poor execution in school, involved withpeers and rising behavioral issues (Bank, Patterson, and Reid, 1996). Researchby Updegraff et al. (2005) demonstrated that sibling’s relational aggression wascorrelated to more prominent negativity and lesser emotional support in theirsibling relationshipRegardless of whetherthe impacts of positive sibling relations on development of adolescent aredirect or whether the connections between positive sibling relations andadolescent development are intervened by different factors has not beenexamined in previous researches.